I think I am depressed as well. before I came to America I was a very jolly person. there were no worries, life seemed wonderful and colourful,but nowadays i feel like a totally different person . i have no enthusiasm, no creativity, no hunger and sometimes no sleep .Sometimes I have identity crisis. I feel like I am losing myself.Is it just a phase in everyone's life or a serious indication of depression?

Correction: read no. 5 as moral

It seems that your condition per DSM 4 TR used by US based psychiatrists is "adjustment disorder with anxiety and depression feature." Other term is also labelled as "reactive depression." It should not last over more than few months and if it persists you need a Psychiatrst.

Is it man you are new to USA and having a "cultural shock" in terms of your disorientation to the naya desh and bhesh. Every thing you hear and do is getting to alienated. If show then man, you need to help yourself by using common sense strategies like going out and meeting any one in the street and asking few questions, reading local history in local library or going out shopping by yourself in Chinatown or Asian bazaar to get familiar with Asian taste and smell in USA, go out dancing, go to movie and build up your activities to get familiar with your neighbourhood and local people and much more.

The more idle you may remain you will be more prone to yesterdays of Nepali good sheltered life and fall more blue and lethargic.

Be up and away man.

Ok guys, those who are saying that they are depressed etc etc may be not suffering from depression,
lets us analyse the different scenario.
In nepal, if you lived at your home before coming abroad (especially to US) were either
1.Pampoered by your parrents.
2.Had very limitedhorizan of friends and grewu up in limited circle. and spend most of the time with that circle.
3. Had no serious thought about life (like, life is very easy, everyhting is ok, I will do fine
4. No methodic (not approching the problems systematically and step by step process.
5.Hughly ambitious (ambition should be based on personla capacity)
6. Everything was so setteled for you (padne, jagir khane, biha garne bachha banaunee) the way was very certain.


when you came abroad then

1. There is no one to pamper you.After study, you have to go for work and after that you have repeate same cycle again and again.
2. Because of your limited circle in nepal, in abroad you cant deal with variety of ppl (you start getting frustration)
3.In nepal you took everything granted, abroad it is not you have to earn evertyhing (you are not concentrating to your work, your body is somewhere and your mind is somwhere, remember an accident is nothing but presence of body and absence of mind, so you strat making accident)
4.You have difficulty approaching the problems systematically and because of this you get set back many times (you feel sad now).
5.You had not set your ambition according to your capacity. Your capacity and your ambition does not match, you want to have easy life and you set your ambition very highso, (here again you start to feel sad).
7. You dont know how to live with high level of uncertainity. In US you find that what was for sure to you in nepal (padne, jagir, khanee , bihaa garnee bachha banaunee) is not certain, and you started to get scared.

The ultimate result.......you are depressed

To get rid of this, medicine is not the goal. You just have to analyse yourself first, 1.Analyse what were you in nepal, how was your life,
2.what you wnated to become in your life, do you really have that capacity.
3.May be you choose wrong field(if you are excellent in one field does not mean that you are excellent in all otheres)
3.Analyse what is your capacity, what can you do and what you cant, and set you ambition according to your capacity.
4. Do not punish yourself for making mistakes (mistakes are part of life, making mistake is very normal) what you should not do is repeate the same mistake.
5.If you make one mistake, learn from it, correct it and be ready for another mistake (we all have made many mistakes in our live, dont we?) and develop capacity to laugh when you make mistake.
6. Change your field, it may be that you have choosen wrong field where you can not do better, but before doing this give a serious thought, analyse, if you leave this field which one will you choose? will you be able to do better in that field? or you just you want to try somthing different?
7. Accept certain degree of uncertainity in your life.try to get easy with uncertanities



No medicine, no one can help you to get out of this. ITS YOU AND ONLY YOU CAN DO IT.
Before following what I have suggested, take a deep breadth, relax, forget the world , because you are the boss do things what you like spend time (a week or two) start to think during that relaxing period and continue thing doing relaxing activities.

when you have not done any illegal things, and if you have not deprived others from their right, you are a fine p[erson and everything is alright.

ok for those guys who do not belong to this catagory, that is, you were not staying at home with parrents pampering but staying at different place than home and doing all by yourself, you came to west and still get frustrated, I will try to put my suggestion some other day.

Dear dot dot dash dash like the golden days of telegraphy,

Why are you being so parochial?

The young guy is just temporarily disorientated in a new culture. We al have different way of coping in a new culture. That is all. Once he/she will be starting to reorienthimself/herself and build his/her own netweork of friends and is supportedby them the matter isj ust question of time to be adjusted in a new culture and start life with the purpose of expanding his or her horizon.

Thus, dot metrix or dash metrix let the setting sun rise again from the east again.

It seems you can still be usful with good news of dot dash dash dot dot....or simply as good dot....

Nepal tara,

Thank you for the comment. For me, it seems that you easily develop some perception about somone after reading few paragraphs from the person. I have no comment about that because ppl are free and I can not run after everyone and if I try that will be worhtless.

Now, about disorientation (as you suggested) of for some of our sahjhaites. I was trying to explain why it happens to ppl (the root cause). Although my explanation was tip of iceberg, because neither it is possible to explain eveything here nor I am capable of doing that (and I think no one else have complete explanation about such things), it was a honest try to help.

Finally thank you very much for the comment, this will be one more addition to my file of experience aboutthe ppl of different nature.

Maturity, or mental health, is the goal of the GROW program. It is the vigour and peace of a person who is wholly attuned to reality.

We describe a mature person as having:

* A strong mind

* A strong chsracter, and

* A loving heart

or as possessing the following great habits or strenghts which we call the five foundations of maturity:

* Understand

* Acceptance

* Confidence

* Control

* Love

GROW WISDOM AT WORK

* A friend is as near as the nearest phone

* Anyone who has aconscience has a chance

* Be sorry for those who don't understand (instead of resenting them)

nepal_tara888, I am sorry but you don't know the first thing about depression and mental health. I am not "temporarily disoriented in a new culture." That is called culture-shock. Everybody goes through it and everybody passes through that phase. I started being depressed after 3 years in the US. It had nothing to do with the new culture b-s.

You said:
--- It seems that your condition per DSM 4 TR used by US based psychiatrists is "adjustment disorder with anxiety and depression feature." Other term is also labelled as "reactive depression." It should not last over more than few months and if it persists you need a Psychiatrst. ---

It seems like you did not read what I wrote. I said I was compelled to seek medical help and was diagnosed with Bi-polar Disorder. It has nothing to do with USA, and everything to do with my brain the way it is.

Mental instability and depression is a serious clinical issue that is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. It is a disease such as typhoid or cancer. I did not choose to be depressed and it's not that I did not have any friends or the social network. It's just that I had no control over it. Sure being with friends helped but I never wanted to be depressed. Your seem to think that we are just bringing it on ourselves by not following GROW. You are wrong. You said:

--- We describe a mature person as having: * A strong mind * A strong chsracter and
* A loving heart
or as possessing the following great habits or strenghts which we call the five foundations of maturity:
* Understand * Acceptance * Confidence * Control * Love ---

First of all maturity has nothing to do with one's mental state. I have seen and met mature people, professionals, in serious mental conditions. You seem to think that I have a weak mind and an unloving heart? The terms that you threw around are just b-s abstract terms that do not mean a thing unless they are used in a proper context. How the f!ck do you control typhoid from infecting you? Same goes for depression. So you think that my depressed mind is unable to "understand" whatever truths that you seem to propound. Do you mean to say that if I am depressed then I am not a loving person.

you said--- Be sorry for those who don't understand (instead of resenting them) ---

dyam that does it, If you think I don't understand please atleast don't be sorry for me. Resentment is better than your pity.

mG.

Dubna Lageko Gham ji, what you are feeling in my opinion is not depression but merely a change of scenery (culture shock) or may be sadness. It can be fatal too, but try diverting your mind to other things and first and foremost, tell yourself that you are "Happy" and try believing in it, your lonliness will vanish.

Advice of an amateur psychologist ;-)
Meera

Dear mindGames or whateva?

If your depression lasted over three years then I wonder that you have had atypical case of Major Affective Disorder is Psychiatric terms and in layman's term Acute Depression that can be in clinical terms described as Neurotic Depression brought about by inherent manifestation of your Neurotic and introverted characteristcs. Furthermore, if you have an insight of the said depression and do not want to take responsibility about it then the hallmarks of a more serious Bi-Polar Disorder in the psychosis range cannot be ruled out.

Ask yourself the question as to why you blame others? Do you consider yourself to be Alexander the Great, when you are high and feel absolutely morbid and go without shower for 5 to 6 weeks arsing depression, and all these are episodic as you do not take your Lithium tablet or get a prick of Lithium injection. Only you know and I cannot observe about your condition. Most psychotics do not think they are unwell and neurotics are obssessed with getting better and that is the diference. The former make castle in the thin air and tha latter build that castle in the air without the basic foundation in this palnet earth.

We GROW are all mental illness suffers and trying to form a network to support each other by being responsible to ourselves. We know the world is not perfect and we can build our lives with a good foundation here and now.

That is al and thank you very much dear mind games.

SOME FIRST PRINCIPLES OF GROW (USE GOOGLE TO VISIT THE ORGANISATION CALLED GROW).

1. Personal Value

No matter how bad my physical, mental, social or spiritual condition, I am always a human person loved by God and a connecting link between persons. I am still valuable; my life has a purpose; and I have my unique part in my reator's own saving, healing and transforming work.

2. Self-activation

My personla contribution to my recovery or growth is irreplaceable to my recovery or growth is irreplaceable. It consists of:

(i) patience and perseverance in practising GROW Program;

(ii) the systematic development and use of my personal resources.

3. Mutual Help

The more maladjusted I am, the more I need help; yet to grow out of maladjustment I need to become concerned for and to be helping others.

4. Ordinariness

I can be ordinary. I can do whatever ordinary good people do, and avoid whatever ordinary good people avoid. My special abilities will develop in harmony only if my foremost aim is to be good ordinary human being.

5. Friendship

Among human relationships, friendship is the special key to mental health. As I am healed and harmonized by responding to the offer of true friendship, so the measure of my maturity is my capacity to be a true friend.

yeah, nepal_tara888, i reacted too strongly there. what you wrote/advised is good advice. take care,
mG.